pension333: Ignore Godfrey Bloom's 'bongo bongo land' comments ? he's trying to provoke

The Ukip MEP's posturing should not be taken too seriously, and nor should his party

The first thing to remember about Godfrey Bloom, the motor-mouth Ukip MEP, is that he's not stupid. When he pretends to be stupid, as his "aid to bongo bongo land" remarks suggest, what he's really doing is pulling the wool over voters' eyes in the hope of winning re-election in Yorkshire and the Humber as part of Ukip's target for 2014: winning the UK's Euro elections.

Of course such language is offensive to many people. When Bloom said on Radio 4's Today programme that most people agree with him, he must know it's not true, though his remark about the Guardian report "probably doubling my vote in the north of England" may contain a shard of truth. A lot of people think that way, north and south.

Nor is it beyond the realms of possibility that aid money funded by British taxpayers has occasionally been diverted to buy Ray-Ban sunglasses or the odd Ferrari, as the MEP told a party audience in Stourbridge. Aid money given privately by individuals ? the method he prefers ? may sometimes end up in the fast car market too. It's a wicked world, we are all frail.

But old Bloom ? he sounds 100, but he's actually a mere 63 ? isn't doing this as a serious piece of policy advocacy. Read a Ukip political manifesto and you quickly realise it's a cut-and-paste job from other people's manifestos or from newspaper articles. There's no discernible research there, no evidence that the consequences of policy options have been thought through, let alone the costs.

"We'll leave the EU, cut your taxes and increase public spending in ways you like, paying for it all by cutting aid to bongo bongo land" is a fairly accurate Twitter summary: saloon bar policy-making on the back of four large gins. Good fun ("doubles all round"), we've all done it, but not to be taken seriously by people who value their votes (most of us do) other than for mid-term protest purposes.

No, Godders is just posturing and pandering, just as he was when he got ejected from the Mansion House during a speech by Lord Turner in 2009, the year after he had to be carried out of the European parliament while making a speech on a combination of alcohol and painkillers. Nothing unforgivably wrong with pandering to voters or speaking under the influence. Lots of politicians ? on both left and right ? are instinctive populists who pander, though the likes of Norman Tebbit or Tony Benn usually have enough political ballast to underpin their colourful riffs with substantial points. Winston Churchill was not always fit to drive when saving us all from Hitler.

But Mr Bloom isn't a real politician like Tebbit, Benn or Churchill, though he is certain to be an admirer of Churchill (Tebbit too, I expect) because his own dad was an RAF fighter pilot, a squadron leader no less, in world war two. Being a financial analyst and pensions specialist, as young Godfrey became, lacks that glamour. You can imagine why he sought fame and glory ? saving Britain from the Huns again, eh? ? in late middle age.

By the same token Ukip isn't a real party, try as it may ? and it does try ? to become one. It's just a campaign ? Britain out of Europe ? without deep roots and with fragile structures. That's why one-issue parties/campaigns are vulnerable to splits, defections and personal feuds, to assorted rascality too. When David Cameron's campaigns guru Lynton Crosby was reported as saying the Tories should monitor the performance of Ukip councillors with a view to monstering them, it was a pretty basic point.

Ukip's MEP contingent may loathe Europe but they have a pretty good time, wine, women and song, with the European taxpayer's money. It's odd that a party committed to ending the "old politics" of the "wishy-washy" mainstream parties should behave far worse than them when given the opportunity. Climate change, the Rainbow Warrior bombing (he approved), it's all a laugh to Godfrey. When he deplored MPs employing family members ? he's right ? during the expenses scandal of 2009, it quickly emerged that he employs family members too, albeit in his private commercial interests. Just a laugh, chums. Know what I mean?

As Rowena Mason reported in Wednesday's Guardian, jolly Nigel Farage, Ukip's fast-talking leader, took a strong stance against an Italian MEP who used bongo-bongo language, had him expelled from the MEP group with which Ukip is linked. Farage has also promised to clean up Ukip's candidates list, inevitably pretty rackety because it is locally chosen and not properly vetted.

Here's a flavour of internecine Ukip strife ? the Junius blog ? and here's a breakaway Junius just for luck. Here's a topical sample. Here's Ukip's own site, getting overexcited about Gibraltar (natch). Contrast it with ConHome, the influential grassroots Tory website's material ? highly civilised and smart.

Alas, Bloom has just called Farage's bluff, as he perhaps intended. Ukip is about to publish his MEP candidates list for 2014 ? Bloom has been a Yorkshire/Humberside MEP since 2004 and is currently secure as No 3 on the elected regional list ? and we can safely assume that Farage does not want to waste political capital trying to remove his name. Though a dominant figure, he lacks both the will and capacity.

So expect a slap on the wrist and a transparently insincere apology ("Right-o, sorry") accompanied by a witty letter to the ambassador to bongo bongo, as Bloom told Today, which overreacted as much of the po-faced media often does to such calculated provocations from the saloon bar at closing time (election time in this instance).

Bloom's outbursts should be treated like those of the militant imams, Irish dissident republicans, and other provocateurs he so deplores. A quiet tut-tut before we all move on to something more important, that would upset the old rogue's breakfast more than denunciations. No point in telling disaffected Tories not to vote for Bloom and the four-gin lobby. They won't take any notice of you, quite the reverse.

But no need to do so either. When the real election comes in 2015 disaffected Tories will have to decide whether they hate David Cameron more than they hate Ed Miliband. By voting for the likes of Godfrey "Ray-Bans" Bloom they risk splitting the core Tory vote and making Ed our next PM. It's a no-brainer, even for disaffected Tories who tend not to believe in what lefties call revolutionary defeatism (lose now, to win better later).

So cheer up. It's only Godfrey Bloom showing off. Straight to the naughty step for you Godfrey and no drinkies before lunch.

Michael White

Source: http://www.theguardian.com/politics/blog/2013/aug/07/godfrey-bloom-bongo-bongo-land-ukip

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